Last January, I started to think about suicide. Something I did that month broke my parents’ trust down to nothing. I dated a guy behind their backs, simply because he was kind to me. I thought maybe through this person, who convinced me he was head over heels in love with me, maybe I could finally begin to heal, maybe things would get better. Read More
Developing healthy habits when it comes to time management is very valuable in life. Not only does it help you get things done in a timely manner, it also keeps you from getting overwhelmed and stressed. I have found out the hard way if I manage my time poorly, I get anxious and risk negatively affecting my eating disorder. Read More
I feel dirty all the time.
I don’t feel dirty in an “I played in mud puddles all day but now I can wash the dirt off” kind of way. No, I feel dirty on the inside. I feel dirty in an “I failed in life all day but there is no way to wash away these imperfections” kind of way.
When it comes to the consequences of both types of dirty, I’d rather sit in church with mud splatters all over my “Sunday-best” than with failure-splatters all over my soul. Why? Because embarrassment runs far less deep than shame. Read More
It comes relatively easy for people to construct an ideal list of desires and goals for the future. The hiccup arrives in figuring out how to get from point A to B. In the muck of attempting to shuffle through the mess, it is easy to forget to accept where you are at present, and to keep yourself on the constructive path to point B.
This topic of confidence and self-care is a larger topic to dedicate time to on a later date, but what I am going to discuss is one of the foundational pieces towards developing a strong sense of self-love–accountability. Now, there are many definitions for this out in the internet’s ether, but I define it as taking responsibility for yourself and for the goals you construct. It is the act of keeping yourself an active participant in recovery, or whatever endeavor present. Read More
Fitspo. Thinspo. Fat shaming. Thin shaming.
There are so many ways in which others attempt to impose their beauty ideals on others. We are told how we should look, wear our makeup, dress our body, how we should eat, the best ways to exercise. Someone else is trying to tell us what is deemed “healthy” and what constitutes being “fit.”
We are told not to make excuses, to get bikini ready, to look like the cover of the magazines, all with false promises of being happy. It’s no wonder it is reported that 91% of women are dissatisfied with their bodies, according to dosomething.org. Read More
If we don’t forgive ourselves, if we continue to lie about how we really feel, we’ll never get over these stumbling blocks life puts out for us.
Today, I still struggle with my anxiety, but I embrace myself for who I am. Some days I wake up and my afro hair is sticking out in all directions and I have an oily face, but I love it. I love my funny mornings and enjoy listening to my opinions.