This month on the site we are discussing motivation. Our team of contributors have thought long and hard about the various things that motivate them in recovery–people, activities, thoughts–and will be sharing them with you in the weeks to come.
Today, as I drove to an appointment (I’ve been having some health issues, which I talk about in a recent blog) I was feeling just a little bit tired by all the decisions I’ve been forced to make, all the appointments I have to keep, and the time, money, and energy that is going into “making me better.” Read More
This summer has been particularly gray where I live in Ohio. The days have been overcast, and we’ve occasionally had severe storms–a tornado even hit us about a month ago. Mostly though, it’s rainy day after day, with no end in sight.
Coincidentally, I’ve been walking through a very stormy season of depression lately. My weeks of summer classes were torturous, with my energy lasting enough to sit through four hours of lectures before it dissipated. Afternoons have been spent irritable and exhausted, while nights pass with loneliness and unbearable sadness. Read More
A couple of years ago my friends traveled all the way to London–where I’d studied for the past couple of months–to visit me for Thanksgiving. It was our first night out on the town, we were at the concert of a band we all really love, and I couldn’t stop sobbing in the corner.
I thought I could control it. I thought I wouldn’t feel this way when friends were here, or at least, I thought I could hide it while they were here. Read More
We are excited to share the changes we’ve made to our Facebook Support Groups! We listened to your feedback, and have now merged all of our old groups into two new groups:
Our Support Groups are a safe place for you to go and be reminded that you’re not alone. The groups have moderating guidelines, and a team of people who oversee the posts to ensure they remain a healthy, positive place for all. Read More
Halfway through a bowl of ice cream, an abrupt, yet familiar, feeling of anxiety was attempting to take control over me. All of a sudden, I became overwhelmingly aware of my body. I could focus on nothing but the folds and creases on my belly resulting from my sitting position, the space I was taking up, and the weight of my being on this planet.
By then I knew very well what was coming: a horrible sensation of claustrophobia, of being trapped, just because of the mere fact that I had to exist inside a body. My first reaction presented itself as a desperate urge to throw the remaining ice cream away; and it was right at that moment when I realized exactly what had to be done. So I went ahead and finished my dessert. Read More
There is hope that you will find control again, you can be forgiven, you will have a good day, you will eat and not hate yourself, you will conquer your fears, you will feel joy around others instead of isolation.
Although I may not be able to wake up tomorrow and be completely free from my eating disorder, I am proud to say I choose to be free from stigma and shame about it today.